Review: Chiller 13: The Decade’s Scariest Movie Moments (2010)

Brace yourselves.  I have a review for an original production from a cable channel that has no giant creatures, no world ending catastrophes, no shitty CGI f/x, and no questionable acting.  That’s right; last night I watched an advanced DVD copy of Chiller Channel’s first original special … and it doesn’t star Dean Cain and wasn’t directed by Colin Ferguson!!  Premiering this Friday night (December 17th at 8pm) on the Chiller Channel, is CHILLER 13: THE DECADE’S SCARIEST MOVIE MOMENTS.  As I mentioned, this is the channel’s first original programming they’ve put together.  It’s a “list show” that counts down the scariest films of the last decade.

CHILLER 13 is presented exactly like Bravo’s 100 SCARIEST MOVIE MOMENTS that airs around Halloween every year.  We get a bunch of genre celebrities (actors, directors, f/x specialists, etc …) sitting around talking about the scariest films from the last decade.  Here we get staples such as Greg Nicotera, Tony Todd, Lucky McKee, Ti West, and Steve Niles, but we also get a lot of comedians and big breasted chicks who really don’t seem to be experts in the field or even really know all that much about horror films.  Sure there’s a lot of funny comments about the films (i.e., “it was so scary I peed my pants a little”), but there wasn’t a lot of insight or fun facts about the films.

Greg Nicotero gives us some insight into his favorites.

And the list itself?  Well I’m gonna let you watch it for yourselves so you can be as disappointed as I was.  All we get are the typical mainstream releases from the last 10 years.  There’s not one indie horror film or even a French film to be found on the list (and let’s face it, the French have dominated the genre in the past decade).  In fact you could probably write the list right now and name all the films yourself.  Big genre hitters like MARTYRS and INSIDE are nowhere to be found.  I was very disappointed.  And the typical flicks like (and I’ll only list 2) 28 DAYS LATER and SAW make the list.  And let’s talk about 28 DAY LATER … We all know my thoughts on this one; there isn’t an original thought in this entire film AND this isn’t a zombie flick.  The killers here are people infected with a rage virus; they haven’t died and come back to life.  But besides everyone referring to this as a “zombie movie”, one commentator even has the balls to say that “Before 28 DAYS LATER there was no such thing as a fast zombie.”  REALLY??  Are you fucking serious?!!??  There were fast zombies as far back as 1980, in NIGHTMARE CITY, and 1985, RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD (both which came out decades before the inferior 28 DAYS LATER).  It’s one thing if the person who made the comment (I’ll let you discover who said that for yourself) doesn’t know their film history, but this is definitely something that should have been caught in post-production (I mean seriously, who hasn’t seen RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD??).

Reverend Zombie & The Candyman himself, Tony Todd.

And I’m gonna get a little picky here and point out that the title of the show is somewhat misleading.  The title reads THE DECADE’S SCARIEST MOVIE MOMENTS.  This implies that the list would be comprised of specific movie moments and not entire films.  If this were the case then I could understand why 28 DAYS LATER was on the list.  Even though I hate that film there are one or two scary moments.  But this list isn’t about specific scary moments; this show does indeed count down the decades scariest films.

Besides being thoroughly annoyed at the inclusion of 28 DAYS LATER being on this list there were many other films that I just don’t understand how they made the cut.  Hell; one flick here was on my “Worst of 2009” list from last year!!  I really can’t go into much more here without giving away the other films on the list, but I urge you to watch CHILLER 13 (again, premiering this Friday night, December 17 @ 8pm on Chiller) and then come back and visit me.  THEN we can really pick apart the list and comment on it in the only way can!!  It’s definitely a flawed list (in so many ways), but its also a lot of fun to watch these kinds of “list shows” with some friends and tear them a part!!  Check this one out and then we’ll discuss the list in more detail next week.

Not that relevant, but isn't this a great shot of Naomi Watts!!

My Summary:

Director:  Shane O’Brien

Plot:  3.5 out of 5 (I don’t agree with 98% of the list, but it’s fun to watch)

Gore:  0 out of 10 skulls

Zombie Mayhem:  0 out of 5 brains

Reviewed by Scott Shoyer

26 Responses to “Review: Chiller 13: The Decade’s Scariest Movie Moments (2010)”
  1. BC says:

    Well, whether you agree with the choices or not, you can’t say there’s not a single indie on the list. Saw, Paranormal Activity, and (I am 99% sure) 28 Days Later were independent films picked up by major studios. Not sure on The Descent, that might be one too.

    • I’ll give you PARANORMAL ACTIVITY being an indie film, but nothing else on this list qualifies and indie. All these films (with the exception of PARANORMAL) have solid budget and distribution before or while they’re being filmed. Nothing was financed by the filmmaker (again, with the possible exception of PARANORMAL).

      • Greg Dinskisk says:

        Wow seriously? The zombie genre has seriously changed in the last decade or so, 28 Days Later wasn’t exactly indie, but wasn’t really mainstream either (it was British… Not a good description, but best I can give right now…). Well that description of it being “the first of the fast zombies” was a bit of an overstatement, but not that many people ACTUALLY saw Return of the Living Dead… I did, but… It’s more George A. Romero than John Russo. And Saw was at Sundance in 2004 before it was picked up by mainstream people…. That’s kinda the definition of indie. Although I loved Cloverfield (I’m a big JJ fan), I really didn’t think it was scary enough to be on this list…. (BTW, I only saw like half of it, so I may have gotten some of the films mixed up……..) Orphan was alright…. I saw that today actually… not really scary though. Hostile wasn’t scary, but more gory (and funny, in a really, REALLY sick way). And if you DON’T think that The Ring wasn’t scary as hell, please leave now. That was a terrifying movie (probably the second scariest of the decade… Maybe…) I know that The Mist wasn’t indie, but that was fairly scary. Great ending. (Was the Decent on there? I thought it was but am not entirely sure) The Decent is probably the scariest movie of the decade, and I dare you to find a scarier one than that shit. Was Paranormal Activity on there? I didn’t really think that was horror… There were some HOLYSHITSHEJUSTTHREWABODYATTHECAMERA moments, but no real HOLY SHIT THAT WAS HORRIFYING moments…… Amusing movie to watch with girls BTW. Well I guess I kinda gave a review on your review…. I wouldn’t say that yours was bad or anything, but if your going to give a review on something, do you mind putting the list on the review at like the beginning or end next time? Thanks. – Greg

      • We definitely agree on one thing Greg … THe RING is an extremely effective and scary flick. Possibly the best of the remakes.

  2. GC says:

    I thought it was a fantastic show! It’s not EXACTLY about what YOU think– the point of the show is to show the movies that scared people the most and they count down that. They do point out the scariest moments in the movies. Plus, this was only the first episode. They are going to do more episodes. This was kind of an opening of the show. I thought it was great.

    • I wouldn’t go so far as to call this one “great.” The movies chosen are extremely uninspired choices that anyone reading a list of films released in the last decade would have chosen. Most aren’t even scary. DRAG ME TO HELL was just a plain old shitty film. I wish these list shows would get more creative and go beyond the mainstream. There ARE genre films (great genre films) beyond the Hollywood mainstream.

      • Greg Dinskisk says:

        Are you just addicted to indie films or something? There are more than just indies out there too. What would YOUR first choices be, out of curiosity? I think they did a good job, if they’re trying to get people to watch it, so they chose movies people actually HEARD of before. Crazy, right? BTW I thought that Drag Me to Hell was pretty bad, but it DID have a good ending…. And 30 Days of Nights (that was on there for sure) was pretty scary too…

      • I’m not addicted to indie films but I firmly believe that indie horror filmmakers are the future of the genre. They are the ones putting out original ideas, creating (for the most part) hugely entertaining films. Of course not all indie films are great … there’s a lot of really shitty indie’s out there. But some of the best recent films I’ve seen are indie horror films.

        My complaint with shows like CHILLER 13 is that they don’t even consider indie films. Who gives a shit if not a lot of people heard of, say, SHELLTER; it’s a fantastic film regardless. Maybe if these types of shows included indie horror flicks then it would shed more light on them and open people’s eyes to some truly fantastic films out there.

  3. nd-anchoress says:

    I agree with your assessment–the list was disappointing, to say the least, and poorly ordered. Paranormal Activity was not quite as laughable as The Blair Witch Project, but certainly not scary enough to rate so high on the list. As well, the misnomer was glaring. I, too, was expecting “movie moments,” not crap like Final Destination being “awesome.” Moving on, 28 Days is not a zombie movie. There were definitely “fast” zombies before it, too. It reminds me of the hype surrounding Brian Keene’s novels, touting him as the “father of zombie novels” and the “re-inventor of all thing zombie.” Sigh. No. Having a zombie fish does not make you a great (or even good) writer who has totally re-invented an entire genre.

    • Couldn’t agree more Anchoress!! I enjoyed Keene’s THE RISING and CITY OF THE DEAD but he in no way “re-invented” the zombie novel. But he did, I believe go back to the basics of what makes a good zombie novel: ZOMBIES … scary fucking zombies!! Did not like DEAD SEA at all. Silly idea that went on way too long.

  4. JV says:

    Thanks for your review. I’m always so disappointed when I watch a film that is supposed to be “horror” only to discover it is anything but. And it’s even worse when someone recommends a flick that turns out to be as boring as white bread. It’s sad, but a lot of folks seem convinced that gross = scary. :(

    • Great point JV. I’ve made the distinction long ago between films that are gross/gory and films that are actually scary. That’s why I use the rating system I developed. From my rating system the amount of stars the film gets for plot and gore are not connected in any way. I could love a movie and it’s gore-less or a film could be nothing but gore yet I hated it. But on those occasions you find the balance … aahhh its all worthwhile.

    • Greg Dinskisk says:

      Yeah people do think like that. I kinda thought that movies like Halloween and Nightmare on Elmstreet were pretty stupid. Oh well. People are stupid too.

  5. LH says:

    I just caught Chiller 13 last week in a rerun, but I missed the beginning. In light of your complaint about the list being too mainstream, I wonder if they explained how the list was compiled. If it was any kind of a poll, that methodology always pulls the consensis towards the mainstream. And the larger the poll, the more pronounced the effect. I suspect this because of The Ring coming in number one. Now I liked The Ring a lot, but number one!? This seems like a movie that would make a lot of top 10 lists, and even if no one ranked it first, it rose to the top based on the sheer volume of number eight votes. Also, did you not like 28 Days Later at all, or just not as horror. It struck me as more of a science-fiction thriller, and I enjoyed it as such.

    • They never went into the methodology of choosing the Chiller 13 list in the show. I believe, and I could be wrong, that the list was written by someone who works at the station. Again, I could be wrong but I think I read something to that effect. I don’t care for 28 DAYS LATER mainly because it doesn’t have an original bone in its body and everyone treated it as the Holy Grail of zombie flicks.

      • Greg Dinskisk says:

        (Sorry by the way for replying to a lot of these…. I’m just kinda bored tonight….)

        I never really thought it was considered the “Holy Grail of Zombie Flicks” as you say…. It’s more like a popular ‘zombie movie’ for late night bored teens. I’m a pretty big zombie fan, but I really haven’t seen all that many yet (Mainly George A. Romero stuff, Zombieland, and Dance of the Dead (which was pretty funny BTW), so I’m not so sure how much I can actually say about it. What would be good suggestions from you of good zombie movies?

      • No need to apologize Greg … I love reading your comments. For really solid zombie films ya gotta go back to the Italian classics. Check out Lucio Fulci’s ZOMBI, CITY OF THE LIVING DEAD, THE BEYOND; Bruno Mattei’s HELL OF THE LIVING DEAD, ZOMBIE HOLOCAUST, and then some more recent ones like DOGHOUSE, SHAUN OF THE LIVING DEAD, & UNDEAD. Let me know what you think.

      • Greg Dinskisk says:

        Okay! Thanks I will check them out!

      • Hope you like them, and I’m curious to know what you think of them.

  6. Don says:

    I was dissapointed that The Grudge did not make the list.

    • I can’t say the same Don. I’m really not that big a fan of the GRUDGE films, neither the Japanese nor American remakes. They always felt to me to be a series of semi-creepy scenes edited together, but there was really no cohesive plot binding it into one story. Sure it has a plot … a weak one at that. :-)

    • Mari says:

      I agree with you Don,I thought that it would have been.I have seen lots of scary movies ,grew up watching since I was a kid and most that aren’t commercial and that list was definitly not the scariest.It seems as though they seem to remake all the originals lately such as “When a Stranger Calls” which is personally one of my favorites.

      • The original WHEN A STRANGER CALLS, Mari, is a fantastic film!! The remake is a textbook example of how Hollywood ruins a classic. In the remake they created a completely sterile story with no suspense, scares, or characters you give a shit about. It was boring, dull, and completely forgettable!!

  7. montanya sisk says:

    omg!!!! i <3 this show

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  • Some of my favorite horror movies:
  • Dawn of the Dead (1978)

  • Evil Dead 2: Dead By Dawn (1987)

  • Martyrs (2008)


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